I have been here twice now and each time was different. Each person, each divorce is different. How you process it depends on the situation that lead up to the divorce. My first marriage ended in divorce due to the prejudices from his family that eventually manifested itself in our marriage. When my son was not invited to family holidays dinners, it became clear he wasn't accepted due to his skin color not to mention the family didn't like my upbringing in the hills of West Virginia. It didn't take me long to adjust to single life and move on from it. The second divorce was different. The dealing with a dying child is partially the cause of the divorce along with the cheating and betraying husband and best friend. People want to say the death of our daughter is the cause but when their love child was born November of the year she died. When you do the math, he was concieved February timeframe and she passed away on March 15. So you tell me how it was her death that resulted in the cheating and betrayal? Yeah, nope sorry your cheating and betrayal is what lead to the divorce you just used your daugther's death to justify it to others.
According to the Cleveland Clinic there are nine strategies to help you move through divorce to a healthy new life.
(1) Let yourself feel
(2) Talk it out
(3) Embrace coping skills
(4) Work together to focus on children (could be hard for some depending on the situation)
(5) Watch out for stumbling blocks
(6) Avoid hanging on in desperation (reason many failed marriages dragged out so long before divorce)
(7) Don't rush into a new relationship
(8) Use self-help and other resources
(9) Stay hopeful
What's life life after divorce?
This to me depends on you.
When to seek help after a divorce?
Please if you feel overwhelmed seek help whether it be a professional therapist or clergy or even a support group. Don't try to deal with in on your own.
Here is the link to the Cleveland Clinic article.
No comments:
Post a Comment