Updates

     Our family has had a rough start for 2021 so far.  Tracy found out one of his estranged sister and her husband both passed away this month two weeks apart.  Brian and I found out we lost our Grandma Betty Guthrie last week.  She was 88 years old.  My step-dad, Danny, according to the doctor's had a mini-stroke.  On top of all that, Tracy is having his third knee surgery from a work injury come February.  We still have very little contact with Whitney.  We tend to find out how she is doing by family members who are around her.  We occasionally receive a short message of "hi, mom or hi, dad" but nothing really about her life.  Nothing from relationships to jobs it is almost like she doesn't want us to know about her life since she moved away from home but yet her biological mother's family seems to know more than we do.  Maybe someday in the future this life choice of pretty much "freezing" or "ghosting" us out of her life per sae will change.

  

Depression Tips

 DEPRESSION TIPS:

Shower. Not a bath, a shower. Use water as hot or cold as you like. You don’t even need to wash. Just get in under the water and let it run over you for a while. Sit on the floor if you gotta.

Moisturize everything. Use whatever lotion you like. Unscented? Dollar store lotion? Fancy 48 hour lotion that makes you smell like a field of wildflowers? Use whatever you want, and use it all over your entire dermis. (Although nontoxic is better long term)

Put on clean, comfortable clothes.

Put on your favorite underwear. Cute black lacy panties? Those ridiculous boxers you bought last christmas with candy cane hearts on the butt? Put them on.

Drink cold water. Use ice. If you want, add some mint or lemon for an extra boost.

Clean something. Doesn’t have to be anything big. Organize one drawer of a desk. Wash five dirty dishes. Do a load of laundry. Scrub the bathroom sink.

Blast music. Listen to something upbeat and dancey and loud, something that’s got lots of energy. Sing to it, dance to it, even if you suck at both.

Make food. Don’t just grab a granola bar to munch. Take the time and make food. Even if it’s ramen. Add something special to it, like a soft boiled egg or some veggies. Prepare food, it tastes way better, and you’ll feel like you accomplished something.

Make something. Write a short story or a poem, draw a picture, color a picture, fold origami, crochet or knit, sculpt something out of clay, anything artistic. Even if you don’t think you’re good at it. Create.

Go outside. Take a walk. Sit in the grass. Look at the clouds. Smell flowers. Put your hands in the dirt and feel the soil against your skin.

Call someone. Call a loved one, a friend, a family member, call a chat service if you have no one else to call. Talk to a stranger on the street. Have a conversation and listen to someone’s voice. If you can’t bring yourself to call, text or email or whatever, just have some social interaction with another person. Even if you don’t say much, listen to them. It helps.

Cuddle your pets if you have them/can cuddle them. Take pictures of them. Talk to them. Tell them how you feel, about your favorite movie, a new game coming out, anything.

May seem small or silly to some, but this list keeps people alive.

***At your absolute best you won’t be good enough for the wrong people. But at your worst, you’ll still be worth it to the right ones. Remember that. Keep holding on.

*** In case nobody has told you today I love you and you are worth your weight and then some in gold, so be kind to yourself and most of all keep pushing on!!!!

Find something to be grateful for!

**Copied and pasted, feel free to do the same**

Frustrations

How does one overcome frustrations with life?  Who knows?  It has been almost a year since our daughter moved out.  We have only heard from her a short message here or there of "love you, mom or dad."  We only get updates from family or friends she seems to talk to more than us.  By all appearances she now seems to value a family which was not there for her over the family who was.  She doesn't seem to understand what this is doing to her dad.  He claims it doesn't bother him but I know better.  I hope one day before it is too late she will realize what her dad means to her.  As for me, I can only hope one day she will come to realize even though I am not her biological mother.  I have done, loved and still do love her more than her biological did or ever will.  I am sorry in my honest opinion as a mother of two.  A person can never ever make up for 20 years of neglect and abandonment no matter how many years, therapy, rehab, repentance, or church services one goes through.  I took a very low self-esteem and motherly loved starved young girl and turned her into a very educated, high self-esteem and very loved young lady in the short 10 years of being her mother.  I was and still am honored to have her choose me to be her mother in the eyes of the law.  I may not be her biological mother but I am her mother by all rights in the eyes of family and the law of this nation.  No matter what is said or done towards me nothing will change my feelings for her.  Many will probably feel this is "airing dirty laundry" so be it.  These are my feelings and how I see things.  Believe what you will. 

New Beginnings and New Memories 2021

      We brought in the New Year with our niece and her new husband.  We hope to have a better year in 2021 than 2020 was.  Looking forward to making memories with all our loved ones and friends alike.  I am going to try other virtual events to try to bring laughter, joy, and memory making events to everyone.  My scrapbook for year 2020 will be very sparse.  I hope we can fill up the scrapbook in year 2021 with way more memories.

Year 2020 in Review

     We have had many issues through out 2020.  One knee surgery in January.  Daughter leaves state without saying a word to us.  The other child is here at home now teleworking due to COVID-19.  COVID-19 shutdown the nation so we were stuck at home except for essential trips to the store.  We tried to keep from going bonkers with the whole stay at home orders.  June another knee surgery all while under the new Safer at Home order.  We were able to go camping so a way out of the house but we refused to travel outside the state.  No real communication with daughter.  Found out by chance she was in the state in July but no word or contact by her.  Second, opinion on knee, now, a third surgery is scheduled for 2021 which will be a complete knee replacement.  Signed up for virtual 5K runs beginning in September.  Ran September to Remember, Rockto ber, Novem-brrr Dash, Gourdy's Pumpkin Run, the Goobles Free-Range 5K, and the Santa Hustle.  We decorated for Halloween to try to bring some joy to the neighborhood.  We held Thanksgiving here for us, son, mom, dad, and niece.  It was nice.  Again found out by chance, daughter was in the state yet again but no visits or communication.  Mind you she is one who has always lived on social media in one way or another.  We decorated for Christmas.  We had a winter wonderland in our yard.  I hope we were able to bring joy and happiness to the neighborhood.  On Christmas Day, we meet our niece's soon-to-be husband.  We feel daughter was in yet again but no contact again.  It feels as though we have been ghosted by our own daughter.  Just before the end of the year.  Our niece gets married.  We gained a new family member has we ended the year at least it was on a positive note.